Untitled.

shutupaubrey:

ketchuponmydick:

shutupaubrey:

if there’s ketchup on it i’ll most likely eat it

When u wanna come over

you took time out of your day to do this

(via smells-like-ugly)

epic-humor:

1o14: i want world peace but there are people i want to kill first

epic-humor:

riders-of-brohan:“I’ve lost weight” I announced.

Everyone congratulated me.

But Weight was the name of my son.

(Source: nostalgiaultra)

hashbrovvn:

*accidentally fists ur butthole* things happen

(via smells-like-ugly)

fartgallery:

pro tip: wear clothes under your skin so when the police chase you down for public nudity you can rip off your skin and reveal your stylish cardigan and make them look dumb as heck

(via alybearxo)

nigerian:

[singing in shower] [simon cowell appears] “its a no from me”

(via alybearxo)

sherlockedbyphaninthetardis:

davedirk:

davedirk:

lauraforgood:

m33wlin:

WE WERE WATCHING THIS MOVIE IN GYM AND THE MAIN CHARACTER WAS LIKE “I’M TIRED AND HUNGRY AND HORNY” AND ME AT THIS OTHER CUTE GUY IN THE BACK JUST BOTH GO “SAME” AND LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND I WINKED AND EVERYONE WAS SO UNCOMFORTABLE BUT I WAS LAUGHING REALLY HARD AND THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE FRIENDS

can we have a tumblr marriage for you guys?

seems legit

woops

IM ACTUALLY CRYING 

(via alybearxo)